


sweet songs never last too long (on broken radios)

by ivyalexandrias



Series: slenderverse fics [5]
Category: Marble Hornets
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anxiety Attacks, BAMF Jay Merrick, Canon Gay Character, Eventual Jay Merrick/Timothy "Tim" Wright, Gen, How Do I Tag, Jay Merrick Has Anxiety, M/M, OAJHGJFN thats not even a tag, POV Jay Merrick, Pining, Post-Marble Hornets, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Marble Hornets Comic Series, Title from a Teen Suicide Song, actually i think it's a cover but wtvr, actually it's like. mid mh comics but i've totally fucked with the canon of the comics, he is!!!! he's so fuckin cool in this fic, jessica will also show up!!!, like it'll take a while but it'll happen, no beta we die like men, not in the fandom anymore so my motivation for this fic is Gone whoop, on a mini hiatus sorry!!! i do not have the energy to update this!!!, tag will be updated as fic progresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:02:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25844725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivyalexandrias/pseuds/ivyalexandrias
Summary: He confirms the address of the cafe, checking it in Google Maps. A five hour drive from where he’s at right now isn’t too bad, he can get some sleep in before he heads out. Of course, by ‘sleep’, he really means ‘staring at the ceiling and maybe napping for about 20 minutes’, but it’s the same thing, basically.OR: What if Jay didn't die? What if he decided to go on to help others?
Relationships: Jay Merrick & Original Character(s), Jay Merrick/Timothy "Tim" Wright, Jessica Locke/Original Female Character(s)
Series: slenderverse fics [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1783279
Comments: 3
Kudos: 8





	1. one

Jay’s tired. He’s tired of running, of hiding, of constantly checking over his shoulder. He still enjoys what he’s doing, of course. Helping people never gets old, but sometimes, in the dead of night, he wonders what would have happened if he’d ever gotten in contact with Tim. If he could have a normal life, after all this time. 

He tries not to think about it too hard. That door long since closed, and now he’s got a new path to follow. He still has the passwords to the old accounts, since Tim never changed them after he “died”. He checks the DMs on there, finding people who had nowhere else to turn except for a seemingly long dead account. 

Some of them are people asking about Tim’s well being (they’re never answered. Jay suspects Tim hasn’t logged into the accounts since Entry #87 was uploaded.), some are simply trolls. But, scattered among them, there’s people asking for help, people asking how Tim survived, how he escaped the operator. Those are the ones he looks out for.

Jay never responds on the main account, it’s too risky. If Tim ever saw conversations he didn’t have on it, he’d be fucked. Instead, he started a second account. He’d debated over the username, before finally deciding on ‘@brokenwings’, figuring that if, somehow, Tim saw it, he wouldn’t think anything of it. 

Currently, he’s scrolling through the messages on the main account, checking for anything new. Sometimes, he’s too late, and it always makes his heart ache. It’s always difficult to reach out to someone, only to receive no response, or, on rare occasions, a reply from a friend, letting him know they’d disappeared, or gone down the same road Alex did. 

After only about five minutes, he finds a fairly new message, dated from just last month, from someone named Mary. From what he can gather from the messages, her younger sibling had been seeing the Operator for about a month, and she’d run out of options. Quickly, he logs out of the Marble Hornets account, signing in on his own, and messaging the girl.

As usual, she’s apprehensive at first, questioning how he knows about her sibling, and why he’s messaging her about it after a month of having no response. He does his best to explain without giving away any personal details. Mary still seems hesitant, but agrees to meet with him at a cafe near where she works. She seems desperate to help her sibling, who Jay learns is named Ama, and it strikes a chord in him. 

Up until the end, he was still convinced he could help Alex. He thought that if anyone could get through to his former friend, it would be him. They’d been best friends since kindergarten, after all. It wasn’t until he felt a bullet in his side that he realized how wrong he’d been. Alex was gone, he had been for years. Jay was just too late to realize it.

The next few hours had been a blur. He’d recognized the familiar red and black mask of the person who’d been following him and Alex for so long, who he’d learn later was most likely Brian. He’d been in and out of consciousness for several hours, and when he finally woke up, he was in a hospital room. According to the nurses, he’d been deposited by the front doors, his supposed savior fleeing before anyone could see them. 

Two weeks of recovery later, and he was out of the hospital. He had no money, no job, and nowhere to stay. He’d withdrawn a couple hundred dollars from his bank account, feeling grateful once again for his ridiculously rich parents, and hit the road a day afterwards. Since then, he’d been living out of old motels, trying to help those he could.

That had been three years ago, and he still hadn’t settled down. He’d cut all contact with anyone from Before, even deleting their contacts from his phone, (he’d drunkenly called Tim one night, and that wasn’t something he was looking to do again, since Tim had tried to call him back no less than 20 times, and it took massive amounts of self control to not pick up), and moved on.

He confirms the address of the cafe, checking it in Google Maps. A five hour drive from where he’s at right now isn’t too bad, he can get some sleep in before he heads out. Of course, by ‘sleep’, he really means ‘staring at the ceiling and maybe napping for about 20 minutes’, but it’s the same thing, basically.

-

Jay spots Mary before she sees him. She’s sitting at one of the tables near the window, nervously drumming her fingers on the tabletop. He quickly makes his way inside. He hesitates slightly, before walking up to her table. 

"Mary, right?" She startles when he speaks, looking up. "Uh, yeah, wh-" She cuts herself off, eyes going wide. "Wait, Jay?" 

Jay smiles at her, nodding. "Yep, that's me. Can I sit?" She nods, still looking surprised. "Y-yeah, sure." 

He pulls out a chair, sitting across from her. He’s all too aware of how different he looks. It’s not a bad thing, really. He’s no longer skin and bones, all sharp edges and hollow bones. He’s actually filled out his frame, since he’s not on the run from a homicidal director and a demonic entity anymore. Mary’s studying him intently, and he laughs softly.

“You can ask questions, you know? I don’t mind.” She starts, blushing slightly. 

“Sorry, I just uh- how are you alive? I mean, no offense, but I saw you die!” She shakes her head, brows furrowed.

“I don’t remember much, I was pretty out of it, but I’m pretty sure the guy in the hood- Brian- saved me. I remember seeing his mask, and being in a car, then I passed out for good, and when I woke up I was in a hospital. I spent a couple weeks recuperating, then checked out, and I’ve pretty much been on my own since then.” She nods thoughtfully.

“I don’t mean to pry but, does Tim…?” She trails off, and Jay shrugs. 

“Nah. I wanted to let him live his own life again. I kept up with the entries after I got out of the hospital, but when he stopped posting, I didn’t really think about it again.” That’s a lie. He thinks about Tim way more than he’d like to admit. He misses Tim, a lot. But that’s not the point.

“Sorry to seem like I’m deflecting but- ah- Ama. You said you’d elaborate in person?” Mary quickly sobers, nodding.

“Yeah, sorry. Got a little distracted. They’ve been seeing the Operator for about 6 months now- we call him ‘Thin Mints’, but it’s still the Operator. It started with them just kind of… staring at the woods behind our house? But after a while they started drawing him, and talking about him with me. They’re kind of… aware that it’s not good, but they view him- it- whatever, as a sort of neutral entity. They think that if they don’t try to hurt it, it won’t hurt them.”

“Which is definitely not the case.” Jay fills in, and she nods. 

"Yeah, it's not the case. I'm just… I'm really worried about her, you know?" Jay nods emphatically. 

"I know. Trust me, I know. I'll do everything I can to help you two, I promise." She smiles faintly at him.

"Thank you, really." She goes to say something else, but is cut off by her watch beeping at her. "Oh, shit. I have to get back to work. Uh- you mentioned in our messages that it'd help if you met them? Is there a good time for you to come over?" 

Jay shrugs, pulling a pen out of his jacket pocket, and scribbling his phone number down on a napkin. "Here. When does your shift get off?"

"My shift ends at 3:15, and Ama gets home from school at 4:00. I- would today be too soon? I have to pick up a coworker's shift the next few days, so I'm really busy." Jay nodded.

"Of course. Don't have anything better to do, you know? Shoot me a text, uh, give me your address, let me know when I can head over?" Mary nodded, taking the napkin. 

"Y-yeah, I'll text it to you. I really do have to get going, though." Mary pushed away from the table, smiling at him. "Thank you, again." 

Jay smiled back, standing up as well. "Stay safe. Let me know when you want me to head over, cool?"

"Yeah, cool. I'll uh- see you then, I guess." She nodded at him, slinging her bag over her shoulder. 

Jay watched her retreat back down the sidewalk, waiting until she'd disappeared around the corner, before heading back towards his own car, hands in his jacket pockets. 

He hadn't been lying when he said he didn't have anything else to do. Might as well waste some time scrolling through social media.


	2. two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He'd picked up smoking as a habit from Tim, back when they'd first started travelling together. The first few times Tim had offered him a smoke, he'd declined, but eventually, curiosity got the better of him.
> 
> He'd kicked the habit only a few months after he'd started, since smoking definitely didn't help his lungs, especially when he spent most of his time running away from things, but he'd started again about two years ago.
> 
> In a way, it reminded him of Tim. Of evenings spent sitting on the hood of his car, talking about the jobs they'd had, or the latest ToTheArk video, menial things like that. 
> 
> It was one of the few things he missed about that time in his life, he supposed. For the first time in a while, it felt like he'd had someone he could confide in, someone who could understand.
> 
> Then, of course, he'd had to go and fuck it all up. 

Jay was starting to nod off when his phone buzzed. He checked it, and sat up when he noticed it was a text from Mary. It contained her address, and a moment later a second text came in, quickly explaining that it was her.

He texted back, letting her know he'll be there soon. Sighing, he sat up, running his hands through his hair in an attempt to smooth it down. 

He pulled on his jacket, grabbing a cigarette from the pack he keeps in his pocket, and lighting it as he stepped out the door. 

He'd picked up smoking as a habit from Tim, back when they'd first started travelling together. The first few times Tim had offered him a smoke, he'd declined, but eventually, curiosity got the better of him.

He'd kicked the habit only a few months after he'd started, since smoking definitely didn't help his lungs, especially when he spent most of his time running away from things, but he'd started again about two years ago.

In a way, it reminded him of Tim. Of evenings spent sitting on the hood of his car, talking about the jobs they'd had, or the latest ToTheArk video, menial things like that. 

It was one of the few things he missed about that time in his life, he supposed. For the first time in a while, it felt like he'd had someone he could confide in, someone who could understand.

Then, of course, he'd had to go and fuck it all up. 

Shaking himself out of that train of thought, he put Mary's address into his GPS, getting in his car, and driving off.

-

It was about a 10 minute drive to Mary's apartment, and by the time he got there, the clock had just hit 3:45. He pulled into the driveway, and Mary jogged out to meet him, still in her work uniform. 

"Hey! I- Thank you again for coming, it really means the world." Jay smiled at her, quickly extinguishing his cigarette on the gravel driveway. She waved him inside.

"Ama's bus doesn't drop them off at the house for another fifteen minutes or so, but that's fine, I kinda wanted to show you their uh- room, and stuff? And their drawings, if that'd help?"

"Yeah, yeah, that'd probably help." Jay nodded, following her inside. 

The walls were lined with old, slightly faded wallpaper, patterned with roses. Mary bustled into the kitchen, but Jay hesitated, studying a photo on the wall. 

In it, there was a younger Mary, a small kid, who he assumed was Ama, and two adults, most likely their parents. From the kitchen, Mary called out.

"You want some coffee? Tea? ...Whiskey?" Jay joined her in the kitchen, raising an eyebrow. "No thanks. Aren't you only 20?" 

Mary shrugged, flicking on the electric kettle that sat on the counter. "Maybe so. Here, while that's boiling, I'll show you Ama's room. It's back here, follow me."

She quickly disappeared into another room, leaving Jay to follow.

She opened a door, beckoning him inside. Jay stepped in after her, scanning the room. The walls were decorated with assorted posters, polaroids, and drawings. Most of them were normal, but he noticed a few of the sickeningly familiar sketches of the Operator scattered among them. 

Without hesitation, Mary kneeled on the floor, grabbing a box from underneath the bed, pulling a bobby pin from her hair and opening the lock with impressive speed. She laughed at his slightly surprised expression. 

“Girlfriend taught me how to do it a little while back. Jess is cool, she knows how to do shit like that.” She flipped open the box, and Jay came to stand next to her. In the box, there was a collection of polaroids, along with a few sketchbooks. Jay picked one up, absently flicking through the pages, and sure enough, they were all filled with the same scribblings.    
  
His attention drifted towards the pictures, however, and his eyes widened as he picked one up. It’s a shot of the Operator, taken from no more than fifteen feet away. How they’d gotten close enough to take the picture, he honestly doesn’t know. Mary glanced over at what he was holding, and sighed.

“Yeah, I don’t know how they took those. You can’t exactly  _ zoom in _ on a Polaroid, and I really don’t want to consider the other option which is-”   
  
“That actually got that close to it in order to take that picture?” Jay finished, and she nodded. He started to say something else, but was cut off by a door opening somewhere else in the house.

“Mary! There’s a weird car outside, did Jess finally replace her shitty old truck?” Quickly, Mary replaced the photos and sketchbook in the box, locking it and putting it back under Ama’s bed.

“No, she didn’t. Meet me in the living room.” She called back, quickly placing everything back where it had been. 

She slipped out of the room, and Jay followed, quietly shutting the door. Mary emerged back into the kitchen, pouring herself a cup of tea with the water she'd put on to boil earlier, before returning to the living room.

On the couch, a kid Jay assumed was Ama was curled up on a couch cushion, scrolling through their phone. They glanced up when he entered the room, doing a double take.

"Holy shit, you're-" 

" _ Language _ ." Mary cut them off, raising an eyebrow. "And yes, it's Jay."

"Sorry, Mary." They didn't sound remorseful in the slightest, immediately returning their attention to Jay.

"Dude, no offense, but you're like- dead, aren't you?" Jay laughed, shrugging. 

"I mean, as far as I can tell, I'm alive. For the most part." Ama nodded, shutting their phone off and putting it in their pocket.

"Yeah, good point. Why, uh- why are you here, though?" They added something under their breath, but all Jay caught was ' _ love _ ' and ' _ Tim _ '. Mary sighed, sitting down on the ottoman across from them.

"Okay, Ama, you know how you've been seeing the Tall Man?" 

"Thin Mints? Yeah, what about 'im?" They paused, then blinked, frowning as they understood.

"Wait, no. He's not gonna hurt me. He said so! I mean, I've gotten close enough to touch 'im before, and all I got was a bit of a headache." They trail off near the end, and Jay can tell even  _ they _ don’t fully believe what they’re saying.

“Look, kid. I get it.  _ Trust me _ , I understand what you’re saying here. But that’s just what it wants you to think. It wiggles it’s way into your head, and it tells you things like that, but it’s lying. I promise, it’s lying.” Ama still looked hesitant, but slightly less so.    
  
Maybe if Jay had gotten through to Alex this early- He shakes off the thought, having gone down that road too many times. That’s in the past now, he has to focus on the people he  _ can _ help. 

The people he  _ will  _ help. He won't let anyone else go down the same path Alex did. Not if he can help it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GDJDJDHD this is a week late and it SUCKS im SORRY.
> 
> i really dont vibe /w this chapter even tho ive rewritten it twice. pls dont kill me. anyways yes mary's gf is jessica that will be important later
> 
> next chapter is tims pov bc i love him <3

**Author's Note:**

> if you want more info about this au (it's actually p fleshed out) hmu on tumblr! my main is @/horrorceri and my slenderverse blog is @/creepy-kralie >:3


End file.
